Thursday, November 5, 2009
Talk Talk Talk...Blah Blah Blah
Is there "one way" to talk to your kids that works for everyone? No way!! But I feel like as long as you have the right motives that you can't talk too much. My motives are to prepare, help process, and sometimes "warn" of potential bad choices. I've tried to teach my kids to learn from others mistakes and ask God for wisdom ahead of time so we avoid the same mistakes.
I've tried to teach them that people act out of hurts...Rick Warren said "hurt people, hurt people..." and we need to be able to teach our kids that. It's out of our own hurts that we hurt others...our fears, insecurity and even our jealousy. So when someone acts out of being hurt and they say something to hurt someone else, we need to be able to not lash back...but understand that they are hurting, pray for them...encourage them.
Every night (at least 99%) Christy and I pray with the boys when they are heading to bed. Most night they each pray and then one of us will pray...sometimes if its too late, i will just pray. One of the things I try to do is always speak blessings into their lives during that time. "God, thanks for letting me be Josh and Jakes dad. God please help my boys to make good choices tomorrow. To be a friend to everyone, a good friend. To be a leader and not a follower...to remember that you created them with a special plan and purpose.".... I try to speak these types of things to them as we drive to school in the morning too...I try to talk about all these things not just when they are in trouble...but even better, when they are doing great...Sometimes Josh will say, "dad, I didn't do that..." and I have to say, "oh, I know son, I'm just trying to give you some advice so when the time comes you will know how to handle it..."
Why am i writing this? Because over the last 15+ years of youth ministry, I believe the biggest problem is that parents talk more to their children when they are in trouble than when they aren't. Can I just say this...you won't regret talking with them...loving on them...speaking blessings into their lives...Help your children see that life is great...even when circumstances aren't...
You've read enough of my rambling...
Go talk with your kids...love on them...and never stop!
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Weddings, Life, bloating and a few other thoughts...
We enjoyed sleeping in a bit...shopping...eating...and just being together for a weekend...we always comment when we are without our kids how much we miss them, but realize we need our time alone too...Isn't that a tough balance?
Christy and I met a former wherehouse student in SLO for lunch before she headed for fresno alone...Luke dropped me off in Morrow Bay to meet our pastors here for a vision casting retreat. Luke is a great young man of God...I appreciate his faith. Got to visit the Cal Poly campus and meet one of Luke's roomates. Man, I sure am glad I'm not in college.
Now I'm sitting here in MB waiting on the rest of the team to show up...looking at the ocean, morrow rock, just amazed at how beautiful God's creation really is...I wonder if people would recognize that more if we (as God's people) would live lives that were beautiful in God's sight more...not just going to church...but loving people like Jesus loves...not accepting sin, but loving people through their sin...or maybe I should say, loving people in spite of their sin. Anyway you look at it, it is our job to point people to him...so it begs the question: Where is your life pointing people? To God...away from God...are you growing in your relationship with him? Cause you are either growing or dying...which one is it? Be honest...
Thursday, October 8, 2009
If your child has Internet on their phone...
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Random Thoughts...
20yrs old...wow, she was born one month before I graduated from High School...her life sounded incredible...I'm sure not without her own issues, but she was in love with Jesus and that just changes thing...Now we ca have hope...Death isn't the end...(freaks me out a bit to say that) but it's only the beginning of a new chapter...
What has my life amounted to in the last 38 years...??? Honestly, am I really doing what I am supposed to be doing? Am I the husband I am supposed to be? The dad that the boys need me to be? The Pastor that I am...is it right? Have I become what God created me to be or have I become what I say I hate most...FAKE?
Have you thought about your life today? What impact are you making...because you are making an impact. Good or bad we are all impacting people...there is no in-between...
Today I witnessed 1,000+ people who were touched by one person...It made me think...
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Follow Chap Clark
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Finally...

It's nearly October...fall has begun...it's finally not 100 degrees...
I went to the gym tonight and did 35 minutes of cardio..3.5 miles...finally Im doing more than paying for the lights to be on...Im finally gonna get slim again..,I mean there are skinny cows...but they still called cows...right?
It's 8:45pm and I am finally sitting at home on my couch...waiting for Christy to come home....

Im glad Tuesday is finally winding down...
Monday, September 28, 2009
Life Hurts God Heals...
Life Hurts God Heals from NorthPointe Church on Vimeo.
Contact Angela @ 276-2300 for more information
Coming Soon to the wherehouse...

We will be joining our entire Church in a 40 Day Journey of Love...
+ Great chance for students to get plugged into a small group if they aren't already...
+We will be challenging students to journal daily through the 40 days...including during our Sunday morning messages...
+Families can dialog together about our messages and serve together @ Convoy of Hope...
Last week I was Really Shocked...

to learn that Doug Fields stepped out of his staff position at Saddleback Church. I have learned a ton from listening to Doug teach, reading many of his books and attending conferences. I've always felt like the guy really was the real thing... I copied the letter Rick Warren sent out to the Church explaining all the recent moves...
SEPT 21, 2009
Dear Saddleback Family,
As you know from watching our years of kidding and teasing each other from the pulpit, Doug Fields is one of my best friends and I love him like a brother. We have so much fun together! He really is as funny and sharp and brilliant as he is when he's on stage preaching a sermon that I've written for him. (Just kidding about that last part!)
For several months now, Pastor Doug has been feeling the tug of the Holy Spirit in his heart to do something new in the next season of his ministry. I want you to know what's happening with him. In today's media culture, we sometimes feel the suspicion that we may not be getting the whole story" behind the news. Because of that, I asked Doug to write this week's News & Views to hear directly from him and I'll add my comments at the end his letter!

Love Letter To Our Church Family- Pastor Doug Fields
For the last several months I have sensed God leading me to something new and different. After a lot of prayer with Cathy, my family, Pastor Rick, and others, I have decided to resign from my role as a Saddleback pastor in order to follow God's lead. This step of faith has been difficult and I'm already feeling the painful loss. But, as difficult as it is, both Cathy and I are confident and excited in God's leading.
As you might expect, Pastor Rick has been wonderful to me during the decision making process. He has been a pastor to me and I'm grateful for him. He gave me two months to continue to pray and be certain of this decision and even told me I could write my own job description to keep me on staff-that was so gracious. And once I was confident of God's will, Rick gave me his unconditional support. Neither Rick nor any of the other pastors wanted me to leave staff, but they obviously understand how God can prompt us toward something new.
What am I going to do? Well, there's not another specific job" that I'm departing to, but I am leaving staff to pursue some incredible opportunities to express my writing and teaching gifts. What I'm really doing is what I've taught you to do-listen for God's whisper and obey it! Several people have said, You're crazy to leave a secure Saddleback Church job during this unstable market." Humanly speaking, they're right... following God doesn't always make sense, but I know I need to do the right thing: listen and obey.
I can't even begin to put into words how grateful I am for my 18 years serving at our church. I came here as a 28 year old youth pastor with a desire to love God, love others and help build Saddleback Church. I have so many great memories and friendships and wonderful feelings confirming God used me here. These have been incredible years for me! From working with teenagers to teaching adults to building the Refinery to starting Fuel to becoming closer to Jesus to hiding all of Rick's disgusting Hawaiian shirts. It has been quite a ride! I am a better person and deeper thinker and a more committed follower of Jesus because of my job and my interactions with the wonderful people at Saddleback Church. When I think of our church I know I am richly blessed indeed. If you didn't get to read my dedication to you in my book Refuel, here's what I said".
DEDICATION: I would like to dedicate this book to the people who call Saddleback Church their home. I love being one of your pastors! I love teaching you the Bible. I love your passion for learning. I love your concern for your neighbors. I love your commitment to pursuing God in all areas of your lives. I love your dedication to giving-and giving generously. I love talking to you and hearing about what God is doing in your lives. I love you!
As a family, Saddleback Church will continue to be our church home. Our best friends are here... our small group... and our ministry is here. I'm not resigning from church, just my staff position. My kids will be involved in the high school ministry, Cathy is leading a small group of teenage girls, and I will occasionally fill-in and preach for Pastor Rick and teach in the high school ministry.
Well, there it is--that's the whole story in a nutshell. Rick and I and the other church Elders wanted you to hear this news directly from me. Unfortunately, many times when a pastor leaves a staff position there are crazy rumors that start flying around. That shouldn't happen here, because there's nothing wrong and I'm not upset about anything...actually, I'm thrilled to be able to leave with integrity and strong leadership support. So, now you can say you heard it straight from the horse's mouth (or the donkey's...whichever you prefer).
This weekend, I'll have the privilege of teaching part 3 in our Life's Healing Choices series. Then, after our current series, Rick has asked me to preach a 3 week series in November. So we'll still be seeing one another... the biggest difference is that I won't have to attend meetings anymore...yeah!
I can't wait to see your smiling face this weekend as we open up God's Word and celebrate together!
So blessed! Pastor Doug
My words of praise - from Pastor Rick
I love Doug Fields with all my heart! In my opinion he has been the greatest Student Pastor in history. He and Cathy are dear friends and we've been through so much together while building Saddleback Church.
Let's review: (1) Doug & family are NOT moving away. They'll continue serving in ministry here. (2) Doug is resigning his staff role as one of our pastors and will no longer have to carry the responsibilities and meetings of being a pastor. He's going to write and speak and serve the Lord. (3) Doug will continue to help me with preaching. He's actually speaking 4 of the next 9 weeks. Beyond that, there's no other back story!"
When the beautiful Refinery was finished, I knew that Doug felt this was the capstone of the most successful youth ministry in America. Doug has raised up and mentored a generation of Student Pastors who are now taking leadership of our next generation of student ministry to the next level, and God is leading Doug to another challenge.
Over the past 30 years, I've had literally hundreds of people join our church staff, become dear friends while serving with us, and then, after a while, leave our staff for a variety of reasons. As a young pastor in the ‘80s, I felt only grief when staff left. But now my understanding of how God works in peoples' lives is bigger. I've learned this important truth: God calls people through Saddleback, not to Saddleback. What that means is that God calls just the right person, at just the right time, to both serve our church and to learn from our church. Then he sends them out to other places as missionaries. We now have former Saddleback staff serving as missionaries in other churches and ministries all around the world. I call them our purpose driven agents!"
This weekend, as Doug preaches, I am proclaiming it Doug & Cathy Fields' Day! To honor him for 18 years of ministry with us, I want us to pack out every service in his honor, and give him a sustained standing ovation before he preaches! Will you help me do this? It will be an historic week to thank Doug for his dedication to our church.
